APPEARANCES CAN BE DECEIVING
CASE STUDY: FIONA
I first saw Fiona in my waiting room five years ago, her face overfilled to the point of looking alien-like.
Her cheeks were abnormally large and sharp, her eyes disappeared into her head
and were almost hidden from too much tear trough dermal filler.
In a heartbeat, I made a judgement that I’m not proud of,
and worse still, was incorrect. I judged that Fiona was a ‘shopper.’
A ‘shopper’ is a term we use in the profession to refer to patients who go from clinic to clinic to get the lowest price.
They often only come to a new clinic when disillusioned and angry that they can’t have their unrealistic expectations met by their previous practitioner.
Or their former practitioner has refused to treat them anymore. When I saw Fiona, I immediately made a judgement in my head.
I had my defences up and decided exactly how I would handle the situation.
After treating many patients, clinicians get handy at recognising those whose behaviour elicits a ‘red flag.’
Unrealistic expectations, lack of acceptance over what is achievable for their face,
and a refusal to listen to expert reason will all mean a ‘red flag.’ I gave Fiona a ‘red flag’ based on her looks.
Beautiful Unique Faces
Anita's first book, Beautiful Unique Faces, was released in September 2020. It became an International Best Seller in Australia and the UK.
Beautiful Unique Faces has seen Anita with a global following, making her a regarded thought leader and public figure in female health, empowerment, wellness, andbeauty. In 2020, Anita won the National ROAR Success - Gold Medal award for Making a Difference.
So far, 2021 has seen Anita win Gold Medal/First Place for the International Feathered Quill Awards in the Self Help category and Bronze Medal/Third Place for the Debut Author category. A finalist for the International Book Awards, Women's Issues, Anita won second place, silver for the AusMumpreneur 2021 Women's Champion Award. In addition, Beautiful Unique Faces was long-listed for the ABDA - The Australian Book Designer Association Awards.
Everyone’s recipe should be different.
It all depends on your unique facial feature and your unique personality feature.
Keep the focus always on you.
Never be swayed into doing what others do,
they are not you,
and you are not them.
Over-frozen and overfilled isn’t beautiful.
This sounds frightening, but the more frozen and distorted our FEMs,
the higher the chance we’ll experience greater isolation and relationship breakdowns.
All from an inability to fully connect with others and, therefore, ourselves.
“I felt like it not only changed my smile, but I
couldn’t smile at all.”
Facial Emotion Muscles - FEMs
As we’ve now learned from Justine and Stella, it’s common to
be misinterpreted when our facial emotion muscles or FEMs are
frozen. In an ideal world, we’d soften the lines with Botox, rather
than completely eradicate them.
The facial lines that depict negative emotions are our frown
lines (which depict anger), our forehead lines (which depict
worry), and our mouth frown (which depicts sadness). It’s not
wrong to portray these emotions. Contrary to popular belief, it’s
these emotions that allow us to connect with others.
We’re most beautiful when we’re most human.
Sadly, this case study has an unhappy ending, which I won’t share.
The message I want Justine’s story to teach you, dear reader, is
that you are most beautiful when you are most human. We can’t
use Botox or dermal fillers (just as we can’t use alcohol, drugs,
food, or exercise) to treat a heart and mind that needs healing. Yes,
we can use Botox or dermal fillers as a healthy accompaniment to
our life - to improve how we feel about ourselves and the way
we look. Yet give it any more responsibility than that and you’re
headed for a terrible shock, like dear Justine.
It’s all about connection.
When we approach someone, regardless of whether we know them, we look at their face to check it’s safe to approach. Our face is how people know our mood and our feelings. It’s the quickest way to identify a potential ‘threat’ from another human being.
An emotionless face, devoid of both negative and positive emotion characteristics, is hard to warm to. People will tread cautiously with someone they can’t read and assume now isn’t a good time to approach them.
Let me break it down for you. Humans seek approval and love from others. We do this by connecting with others. We need to connect with other people, so we feel like we belong. Only when we feel like we belong, can we truly feel safe and calm.
Vulnerability = Connection = Safety = Love
WHY DO OUR FACIAL FEATURES MATTER SO MUCH?
When we remove all facial movement, we remove the ability to show vulnerability, and vulnerability is what nurtures connection in human relationships. When we remove all facial movement, it creates a significant impact on our life and our relationships.
CASE STUDY: JUSTINE
“I want all my facial movements gone.”
Justine was a patient at the practice I was working at during the start of my career. Although I have treated thousands of women since Justine, I think about her often. I wonder if there was more I could’ve done to help her. No, that’s not correct, I know there was more I could’ve done to help her. Justine is a lesson to us all.
Do the next right thing.
Over the last few years, my moral code has been at odds with my sense of responsibility for contributing to a society in crisis which continually seeks perfect facial features.
Is this book for you?
Get ready to meet some of the amazing women I’ve met in my life. Their stories have taught me the secrets of discovering breathtaking beauty and happiness. Some of their stories are heartbreaking and they don’t end well. Others are empowering and are the Unique Facial Features version of fairy tales. All will teach you valuable lessons and, like all good fables, how to avoid evil (keep yourself safe) through tales of woe, as well as how to empower yourself to look, feel and be your absolute best.
𝐀 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲 𝐔𝐠𝐥𝐲 𝐅𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐬.
Pretty Ugly Face or PUF is a term coined by a patient of mine during a passionate discussion of why women were overtreating their faces with Botox and dermal fillers.
𝐂𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐮𝐝.
Thankfully, social media accounts now exist with the sole purpose of exposing the media outlets and celebrities who fraudulently distort real images into heavily filtered ones.
𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐰𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐮𝐥.
I love all women. I’ve never met a woman who wasn’t breathtakingly beautiful in her unique way.
𝐖𝐡𝐲 𝐝𝐨 𝐰𝐞 𝐝𝐨 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐬?
It’s hard to explain why they do it, but I’m surrounded by it, and it’s as simple as; they don’t know what their Unique Facial Feature is, so they don’t realise what makes them beautiful.
𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧: 𝐖𝐡𝐲 𝐈 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐁𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐔𝐧𝐢𝐪𝐮𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤
When I saw people's pain after the decision they made just to look better, I made it my life's mission to make it right and make everything better.
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐧𝐨𝐰!
The dangerous trend of trying to look a certain way and feeling pressured about it needs to stop now!
All together, let's make the world a safer and more accepting place for everyone.